tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-90637721172426512052024-03-13T08:14:19.700-07:00Home ForeverWelcome to our journey with God to bring home Mia, and all the days after I can think of something to say.... Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.comBlogger66125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-19676839122085846012011-04-16T13:42:00.000-07:002011-04-16T13:43:29.188-07:00back to the basics.....So, recently my husband and I were challenged with a situation that resulted in an outcome that was not exactly what I was hoping for. (how's that for vague? :-) In the midst of the situation and all the wrestling that went along with it, I had some revelations. God was using this situation to bring about something else in my heart and work on some things there. I read an article about how the church has really left a bad taste in the mouth of the world. I know that is obvious to many of us that we see and hear how non-believers have been burned, hurt, etc...and now don't want anything to do with the church or Christianity. THere are days worth of discussions behind the whys of this, but what I was intrigued by was our response....my response in my own heart. It seems many, in an attempt to try and not offend those around us who are among the numbers of hurt and burned, that our approach has been to remove the mention of Jesus from our conversations. "Let's talk about God's love and acceptance and purpose for their lives, but let's not mention Jesus.....it's too controversial and offensive." I know for me, I have in many conversations danced around the topic of Jesus for these very reasons as well as the huge obstacle of really not wanting to be rejected. After hearing a sermon recently from a minister from a few years ago, though, I had a revelation....and that is, that when you seek the approval of man, you are exhibiting a man-centered view point (aka "supremacy of man"). I know there are times when I have served the interests of man (others and self included) by my attempts to "share God" or hope with others and all the while serving the interestes of man, as if others opinion of me is the first priority. I was challenged to rethink this approach with a "supremacy of Christ" mentality. How would it change my interactions with others if instead of being worried about offending them, or being disliked, I was more concerned with sharing the life-saving hope of the gospel of Jesus Christ? Jesus did what He saw His Father do. He had his eyes fixed on the Father at all times. And as He walked out his ministry with His eyes fixed on God, He didn't have to worry about how people would receive (or not) the truth. I am not trying to give a blanket approach to evangelism, and say that we must always give every step of the Romans road to every person we meet, but instead, I am making statements regarding the attitudes and motivations of my heart. I don't want to shrink back from sharing His truth out of fear or concern for what others will think. The bottom line is, eventually, in order for someone to come to God, they must first go through the Door. There is only one door to God and that is Jesus Christ. I want people to come to know the love of God desperately, but at some point, they must choose to accept the way that God provided to get to Him. I am not completely opposed to the idea of seeker friendly churches...to be honest, I haven't spent a lot of time thinking about it. But the attitude I sense a lot is this, "Whatever you do, don't mention the name of Jesus, don't talk about sin, and don't tell them they need to repent of anything." Wait a minute.....isn't that the crux of the gospel message???? We HAVE all sinned...we DO need to repent (that was the message of John the Baptist who "prepared to way" for Jesus to come). And then it occured to me again....if the gospel isn't for the lost, then who is it for?<br /><br />The implications of this aren't just for the lost though, the idea of being afraid to speak truth also applies in situations where we are addressing believers as well. There is a kingdom at stake....there are people walking around in broken relationship with the Father or not in relationship at all. As I ponder all that God means to me, and especially as I have been reflecting on Jesus as we approach this Easter season, I am overwhelmed at his love for me! And what hope I have been given, this is the hope I have to share :-) Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-57892841003834220862011-01-18T08:11:00.000-08:002011-01-18T08:36:44.636-08:00You GOTTA be you!Well, in case you haven't noticed, this blog has morphed out of the realm of just focusing on adoption, or our adoption story, to just a place where I can jot down my thoughts on life, God, and what it is to live where I am right now. I guess it isn't necessary to really post anymore, but unlike journals, I can't lose the internet, so for now, it seems this is the most consistent place for me to keep up with this! <br /><br />Idols. Alot comes to mind when I hear that word....old statues, food, sports, Billy...(haha:-) Today on the way home, though, God began to talk to me about another idol I have in my life. (No, not Billy). It was someone. Someone very dear to me who has my respect and is a fellow lover of God. However, as God began to bring this into the light, I began to ask myself "why" questions. Why do I look up to this person, even sometimes to the point of envy? There were many answers I won't share but what it boiled down to had to do with the PERCEPTION that this person really has it altogether. They seem to be able to handle life so much better than me--having it all together, never being in want, always on top of things, never looking like they have a need or need to depend on anyone else...you get the picture. I capitalized perception because even as I listed these things that I was becoming aware of, I realized that this is NO ONE. This isn't even really true of this person. Secondly, what I find attractive in all of this is counter to what God has for me, and really is the root of what caused the entire fall of the human race to begin with===PRIDE. Despite knowing in my head this is really destructive, I have often times in my life found myself trying to emmulate others who fit the "got it all together" description. <br />Let's just put aside the fact that this sin took down the entire human race in one bite, and consider this as well: we are all truly image bearers of the one Living God. He has put unique expressions of Himself in EVERY individual. In the history of humanity, there has NEVER been one repeat. Not one person who is exactly like another one. What this says is that the ENTIRETY of the human race has STILL not COMPLETELY reflected the FULL image of this amazing God we serve! To me, this serves as reason for me to really seek to be me! I want to reflect, as much as I am able to, who He in me...it is a piece that if I don't steward well and take care to discover and show, the world won't get to see...or at least those in the world I am supposed to show. You have to show who He is in you. I want to see as much of Him here as I can and if you or me or any one of us is spending time trying to be someone else or someone we aren't or some image of what we think we should be, we will never be who we really are and those around you will never experience the part of God's heart he desires to shine through you. Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-28511669655074196952010-12-31T08:04:00.001-08:002010-12-31T08:24:52.340-08:00December 30, Jesus Calling Devotional:" I am leading you along a way that is uniquely right for you. The closer to Me you grow, the more fully you become your true self--the one I designed you to be. Because you are one of a kind the path you are traveling with Me diverges increasingly from that of other people."<br /><br />For the last two days, I have been chewing on this and trying to determine why it speaks to my soul so deeply. Today as I once again sat down to spend a few moments with Him, it hit me (He learned me :-) I look to identify with others on their paths... sometimes, even trying to immulate the path they are on in my personal walk with God. Whether that be through how I express my faith, my "causes", or just how I view the specifics of how I relate to Him. The devotional goes on to say, "However, in My mysterious wisdom and ways, I enable you to follow this solitary path while staying in close contact with others." I and I think I could say "we" here (sneaking suspicion I am not alone in this) are constantly searching for who we are--we want our value, purpose, and call to be very defined. I want the Lord to define me and how I should handle life, what I am to do and who I am to be so that in any and all situations, I will know what the right thing is. Here is where I ask myself, "why?" "Because," He says, "you resist being soley dependent on Me." Guilty. I do....we do. Just give me the instructions. I want the plan because I don't want to screw things up. I don't want to be wrong. I want to be independent and self-sufficient. "But that is not how I designed you." He says. I MADE you to be dependent on Me. "My abundance and your emptiness are a perfect match." --J.C. "But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us." I am truly just a pot. It just hit me this morning that the only hope of being what I long in my soul to be, my only hope of loving others, helping, knowing what to do and how to live is to cleave to the one who made me, walking my solitary path, listening, asking, depending on Him at every turn and in every moment. Our journey is one of increasing dependence. In that, all that we need and were designed to be can come into fruition. Outside of dependence, self-righteousness can rule and we miss not only what we really are and are called to be, we miss true fellowship with Him. Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-86036115481868201552010-10-12T13:20:00.000-07:002010-10-12T18:23:47.018-07:00The risk of close relationship....What does it look like to truly live your life before God? Big question, I know, with no quick answer. However, I got a revelation today about a little more of what it looks like for me. God gave me a picture once in my head. It was me standing in a completely white room, with Him as the only one in the room. He said that one day I would stand before him just like that without anyone else there. That is how he wanted me to live my life today. Just like that--before him as if there was no one else in the room. Easier said than done. I realized today that I HATE to disappoint anyone! Even if I can see that what I did to upset that person is really not a big deal, it makes me want to crawl under a rock and feel very sorry for myself. "Are you that arrogant that someone else can't feel the freedom to share that they were disappointed by you in a good way? Don't you want to know that and want them to feel like they can share those things if they need to?" Is what I heard the Lord say. Ouch. Yes, Lord, I do. "Rest in my grace for you. Rest in my favor for you. Then, you will be able to respond in a way without shame or condemnation that is humble and seeks forgiveness." The risk then? being "found out". "I am not perfect and because I am letting you in my life, you are going to see it and I really don't want you to!" Is what my heart says. "It's time for you to move into this kind of relationship. You have what it takes in the fullness of my favor to be able to take responsiblity when you wrong someone and not be flooded with shame." Is what He calls me to. And because I don't stand before him condemned, I can stand before others wrong but still not condemned. My identity is in him not in what others think of me. Whew. That was a load off...So, all my precious friends, I love you and I am going to disappoint you. There. I said it. I will try not to do it intentionally, but if I do, let me know so I can ask for forgiveness. Then, I am going to stand in the forgiveness of Christ the same as I did on the first day I knew him. :-)<em></em> Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-5341616459086787362010-09-29T10:54:00.000-07:002010-09-29T11:25:36.191-07:00HelpSuch an easy word to spell, but why so difficult to say? Having grown up as the youngest sibling in my family (and in my husbands), I have had to privelidge of watching my older siblings and in laws raise 20 nieces and nephews right before my eyes. Some of them are young still, like mine, but a couple are in college with a handful more just on their heels. I must say, my older siblings have done FABULOUSLY with raising their kids. I have witnessed how to do things and how to patiently respond; what things to worry about and what to let go; balancing acts and most of all that things go by SO fast and make sure you just enjoy the moment, for it truly is fleeting. Needless to say, I felt pretty confident about my knowledge and preparedness going into parenting. Don't get me wrong, there were many things I was not prepared for and have learned a long the way. I have been stretched as a wife and a mom with each new addition, and have seen so much of my own sinfulness and inadequacy. However, despite these challenges, I have always somehow managed to juggle all the balls myself, with little help from friends, and occasional help from family. So when we brought Mia home, I anticipated change (and maybe got more than I bargained for:-) and transition, and a new level of busy but I didn't expect to have to ask for help consistently. <br /><br />As of this year, I went back to teaching on a very part-time basis (teaching one class twice a week for 2 hours). The timing and all plus the way it worked out was truly a God thing. I have loved every minute and as far as I can tell, my little ones at home are still doing great and thriving, not really missing out on too much mommy time. However, to say that I am on a faith journey is an understatement. I am truly in over my head and I do NOT know what I would do without the friends in my life right now. Hear me in that I am not desperate or overwhelmed. On the contrary, I don't recall feeling this much peace in the midst of this much chaos ever in my life. Between two boys in two different schools on two different schedules, extra weekly dr. visits for one child, then two toddler girls at home and one more small child home half the time, and one teaching job, house work, a good marriage to tend to, a new health plan to implement and trying to relax and have fun and just enjoy my life and my family I can honestly say I have never in my life been this busy. But it is a good and necessary busy. But I have had to learn how to say one really difficult word. Help. God has been gracious to make it a little easier on me to ask in that he has introduced our family to another one (the McKinneys) who are at mine and Ben's new school. To say that I am blessed by the servant hearts they have is an understatement. Not just willing to take ALL of my kids when I need it, but asking to. We do trade off and I get to reciprocate the favors, but I'd have to say it isn't quite even. :-) Yet, as I have been in a constant state of receiving from these friends (and others) I find myself questioning whether or not I am supposed to be doing what I am doing. Then the Lord started to show me something. Our culture pushes on us the idea that if you can't manage it all, all by yourself, you must be doing something wrong. Self-sufficiency is glorified, and it just so happens that my flesh tends to fall in line with that. I really am dependent on others right now. Not in a "if you don't come through for me I am going to die right now" kind of way, but in a way where I truly see my NEED for others and for relationship with them. I am living the life I believe God is calling me to live and yet I am seeing that this life necessitates that others come along side me in this journey. I would be ignorant to think God isn't accomplishing other things through my dependency beyond the needs of our family being met, but at the same time, it is quite evident that He is teaching me something and shining a light on my pride. I love even this, though. I don't have time to tell you how many times the Lord has worked out things in my schedule that proved to be more than I could "plan" for. There have been many mornings that I have woken up with "more to do than I had time for" and though filled with some anxiety, watched the Lord work the details of my day out for me in ways that I just couldn't despite my best efforts. So, thank you Lord, for your faithfulness in the little things. Thank you to my sweet friends who have selflessly come along side us to walk with us and share some of the load. Hopefully, if you find yourself in over your head, yet sure you are walking into something you believe God has called you to, you can learn how to say a humbling little word that crosses my lips frequently. Help. Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-89501680532448948882010-08-10T04:12:00.000-07:002010-08-10T04:17:43.599-07:00ReflectionsI was recently asked to write our adoption story to share for a women's retreat at our church. Having experienced so much since the beginning of it and not wanting to submit a book about it as opposed to a short synopsis, I just asked God to lead me what to say, and it was give the nutshell of the how and what and then just write what I have learned through the process. 13 years is a long time to journey but as I began to write all that God had shown me through just this journey, I was suprised. Just thought I would share, forgive the spacing issues, copy and paste was easier than retyping:-)<br /><br />Some days just stick out in your mind. Moments that upon entering into them seem quite mundane and regular<br />can in an instant become markers that put you on a different path, some how becoming etched in stone in your mind and heart. <br />Walking into our university library as a 19 year old college student to write an english 101 composition paper was one of <br />those times in my life. Given the freedom to chose our topic, I non-chalantly picked up a recent copy of TIME magazine, <br />and thumbed through articles on current events. Intrigued by one of the titles, I turned to a story that explained<br />the then recent policy institued in the nation of China that limited couples to bear only one child. I read on <br />about how culturally speaking the family in China was very much centered around the paternal figure, elevating and<br /> valuing him above the female members of the house. This cultivated a strong desire for male children, and thus in <br />turn conversely resulted in many baby girls born only to face abandonment, rejection, or death. I read the accounts of<br />people who had stumbled upon these precious infants in garbage dumps and allys; stories of babies being aborted and <br />thrown into rivers. But I also read that there were some baby girls taken to orphanages. Babies allowed to live, but<br />without a mom to hold them and a family to care for them. And in a moment, as if upon my eyes being opened an invitation<br />had been extended, I instinctively told my Father, "I'll take one." In my mind, as long as there was breath in my lungs and <br />love in my heart, there was no reason why I couldn't adopt one of these baby girls and love her. My heart broke for the rejection<br />these little girls were feeling just because they were little girls. I would do it. I would step into this senseless horror <br />and love a child. I knew I could at least do that. Nearly 13 years and three biological kids later, I found myself along side<br />my husband in a taxi cab being shuttled quickly through the bustling streets of Kolkata, India, where we were lead to a small,<br />white, unsubstantial, building in the middle of many more buildings. It was all a blur as we were hurried in and up a flight<br />of stairs that suddenly opened up to a room full of cribs. Moments later I found myself staring down at two big, tear-filled,<br />uncertain brown eyes belonging to the daughter of my heart. Thirteen years I carried this child in my heart and all of a <br />sudden, here she was. To say this moment was surreal would be an understatement. However, the journey in between was anything<br />but. What I haven't shared was the twists and turns and the emotional ups and downs we encountered along the way. I will spare<br />you these details, but I will share what I learned as a result. First, life is NEVER about the destination, it is always<br />about the journey. It is not about where we go, how we get there, but WHO we go with. Moses and the people of Isreal did not<br />wander through the wilderness, they were lead through the desert with a purpose by God's Presence. Logistically it didn't need to take <br />13 years to bring home the child God planted in my heart as a teenager, but it was his best for us. I have learned that long-<br />suffering can't happen in a short amount of time. I have learned that I am more sinful and selfish than I ever realized I was <br />and that He is more wonderful and I could ever possibly begin to fathom. I have learned that while a desire to adopt may seemed <br />to have come from me, it indeed originated in the very heart of the Father. I have learned that as sons and daughters of the Father, <br />created to immulate His heart, and in the likeness and nature of Christ "do what we see our Father do", we should <br />not be suprised when our heart responds with a desire to care for the abandoned and orphaned children of this world, but instead<br />should be suprised when we don't. I have learned that God will finance what He favors. I have learned that to follow Christ is <br />at times inconvienient, uncomfortable, exposing, impractical, scary and unsafe. I have learned that to be misunderstood and <br />criticized is par for the course. I have learned that I was invited to go on a bus ride but not asked to drive or plan the details<br />of the trip. But, in all of this, I have seen deeper parts of the Heart of God and I ever even knew existed. I have come to <br />know more deeply the intimate love and grace he has for us and the lengths He has gone to to be with us. I have learned that <br />when I looked down into the eyes of this child whom I had never met and did not birth, I saw myself, and as I watched my <br />own arms reach down and draw her to myself I saw God's hands reaching out to me. Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-77302616304411715962010-07-12T11:16:00.000-07:002010-07-12T12:04:25.008-07:00If God is for us....So, I cannot stop listening to this song (should be playing right now if you are reading this blog) "Our God" by Chris Tomlin. I think the reason I like it so much is because I am really coming to believe with all my being that indeed, my God is for me. That doesn't mean He always wants what I want (or that I want what He wants) but He is ALWAYS for ME. He roots for me. He cheers me on. He has got my back. He won't leave me, mislead me, take His eyes off me, and surely if there is anything ANYTHING in my life that I face that is overwhelming, whether I got to that place by choice or not, I am sure that He goes before me, is my rear gaurd and walks beside me to see me through. There is nothing our God can't do and if there is nothing He can't do, then there is nothing I can't do with Him beside me. Too often we face our future not with a sense of who He is and what He is calling us to, but with who we are and what we are capable of. I recently have been bombarded with stories of marriages that are in trouble. Everywhere I turn I am hearing of another couple who is struggling some very seriously in this area. I have been talking to God and asking for clear pictures of marriage in general and for wisdom as some of these couples are asking us for advice. Two things I feel God shared with me are this: one, a better understanding of our roles in covenant marriage as defined by God, and two: HIS role in a covenant marriage as defined by Him. First, He brought me back to the garden. To Adam and Eve and what it was like for them when He first breathed life into the dust that they were. The single greatest gift He gave to them was Himself. Communion with the Father on a DAILY basis in the garden. Oh to walk in the cool of the day, in the garden with my Father at my side, talking, lauging, having him explain all that He had made to them, fellowshipping with no shame guilt or walls of any kind to get in the way. This was man's greatest loss when we chose to sin and rebel against Him. Thus surfaced our deepest need which is to regain what was lost. Without the Love and fellowship of our Father, we are lost, broken, hurting, beings with no purpose or direction and no Hope of ever being the glorious display of His image He designed for us to be. Redemption and reconciliation of man was the ultimate plan. Marriage plays a HUGE role in this. AS a spouse to another broken hurting human being, my role is unique and unlike any other. I have the Holy and sacred honor of loving as my Jesus loves and was poured out for me. NO OTHER PERSON IN MY SPOUSE'S LIFE HAS THIS OPPORTUNITY. For it is in truly seeing my husband and all that he is, both broken and all that he was designed to be, and TRULY loving him in spite of all this, do I even begin to walk out the same kind of love that Jesus shows me and showed me when He died for me and continues to pursue me with loving kindness on a daily basis. Many people can show love to my husband, but no one has the opportunity to show him as deeply as I do or in the same ways as I do. I am the only one with the honor of stepping in Christ's footsteps in this way. And when He is not being easy to love (like me a lot of the times) is when my opportunity to be like Jesus is the greatest. It is an honor to choose to love in the face of suffering and persecution or rejection because that is the purest form of the love of God I can display. In doing so, I am playing a key role in my spouses life in the story of redemption of His soul and reconciliation of himself to God. We must stop seeing our spouses lives and their offenses in terms of only what that means to our lives. There is a MUCH bigger story going on. It should break our hearts for our spouse when they are going down the wrong track because that means they are getting further away from HIM. HE is what they need and our job is to listen and obey God in how we should respond so that that holy relationship can be restored. Marriage should be a glorious display of the intimate, committed, long-suffering love God has for his people played out in our lives. Marriage has a kingdom purpose that is bigger than just the story we are living in our short little lives. Second, I have heard ALOT of people regurgitate the lie that has been fed to them, that they never should have married in the first place, that they weren't the right ones for each other, and that they should just divorce and begin their new "search" for the "right" person. Can I just boldy say now, with a full heart of love, THAT IS A COPOUT!!!! What this discounts is the second thing God taught me. When you stand before God on your wedding day, and commit your selves to one another, there is a third person committing themselves to you at the altar. GOD. When you step into the covenant of marriage, God commits himself and every resource in the heavenlies to making your marriage work. HE IS FOR YOU and is FOR YOUR MARRIAGE WORKING. If two people seek God even at the depths of a pit for help, He will move heaven and earth to help because He is for us and not against us and He is for marriage. Notice, I did say TWO people. One willing person is not enough, although it may start with one heart who is willing and brave enough to walk and wait for the other person to come along. NO MARRIAGE is beyond saving if both parties will humble themselves before God and ask for his help. If your God is for you, NOTHING can stand against you!!! Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-33935412091556517292010-06-22T17:14:00.000-07:002010-06-22T17:20:23.963-07:00T-R-O-U-B-L-EI wrote this a few days ago, but just got around to posting... <br />"In this world you will have trouble, but I leave you my peace, that where I am there you may also be...." These words, based on scripture (John 16:33, 14:27), sung by the late Rich Mullins are what has been playing over in my mind this morning as I have awoken to all that awaits me this beautiful June morning. Twice have I read this scripture recently in the Jesus Calling (JC) devotional. Funny how it takes a while for truth to really set in. Sarah Young wrote in JC the question God posed to her, which is, "Why are you suprised when you actually encounter trouble?" (paraphrase) Today's trouble was waiting for me in the form of a leaking sink left dripping all night. The evidence was not only seen under the sink but also coming through the ceiling downstairs when I was on my way out the door for a sanity moment (walk to starbucks armed with worship on my ipod) before every one got up. After dealing with the mess upstairs, a pot was put under the drip downstairs and I was out the door to salvage what was left of my time alone :-) As I started walking, I noticed in myself a sense of shame and guilt for the leaking that was happening. Perhaps it is coupled with the fact that we have a handful of trouble left over from yesterday in the form of other house woes. "What have we done wrong?" Was the question I heard in my head. Therein lies what God really wanted to deal with me with. Why is it that when something goes wrong, we ( I am assuming I am not alone in this) automatically try and rehearse all that we have done to cause the trouble? I then noticed that the worry that maybe we made a bad decision in buying this house was causing me to feel ashamed, even before my God. It also exposes my pride. I don't want it to be seen that I might have made a bad decision or that we were mistaken in what we felt led to do. Ugh. Then comes the truth. I am not here to look good. I am not here to show anyone how to make good sound decisions. I am here to bring glory to God, to be less, so that He can be more in me and through me, to boast in my weaknesses. How incredibly counter-flesh that is. I was reading in 1 Kings where David was giving his charge to Solomon who was about to take the throne. He was urging his son to be faithful to follow God and obey with all his heart and soul. If he did, God PROMISED that there would always be a man on the throne to rule over Isreal. Time, of course, showed that faithfully following God did not last long in that family line, but what I know is that God would have been faithful to that promise. He is ALWAYS faithful to keep his promises. As sure as the sun rises He will not break the covenants he makes with His people. There in lies the peace He has left with me. He promises to care for his kids. He promises to provide. He promises that He will never let His righteous ones see decay. He is the lifter of my head, the lover of my soul. <br />And He ALWAYS will be because that is who He is and because Jesus opened a door to the Father that no man can shut, that no leak can flood, that no trouble can overshadow. So now then the question is not, "Why did this happen?" But "What does God want to do in this and through this and in me?" I am glad I got to this place before I walked in the door to an eight year old with a swollen, puffy, red, hurting eye.... Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-64819915542785372182010-06-02T04:18:00.000-07:002010-06-02T04:38:10.661-07:00Crossing overSo lately, every where I go, just about, I encounter someone, believers and some not, who are interested in or are pursuing adoption. For some, the call is so near, it almost engulfs them. It is all they can think about until God starts to put things in motion. It is kind of like watching someone in labor:-) Ask any woman, the week or so (some even longer) before she delivers, she is SOOO ready! Enough preparation already, bring it on! I have gotten the privilege of being with several friends during their births, and there are some definate signs of stages of labor that are in many ways identical in each process. It is funny to see some similar "progression of stages" during the adoption process. I told Brian that what I am seeing is not so much that many people are all of the sudden "deciding" to adopt. I mean, we didn't just start having orphans recently, they have been around for a while. I believe that there is a spiritual movement, started by the very heart of God to care for these kids. Why now? I don't know. I do know God sees the full picture of eternity and time and I am sure there is a bigger kingdom purpose to all of it than what any of us can realize. God is doing something big, all on his own, and is inviting a lot of people to join Him. The reason I call this one crossing over, is because I believe that during the process, many times He also changes our hearts. We start out thinking that this is about us. We decided to adopt. We are starting the process. The reality, all you did was say yes to something God called you to. You cross over from a "us" centered purpose and God begins to show you the "Him" centered plan. I came across this verse this morning, and it really spoke to me. "I know longer call you servants because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead I have called you friends, for everything I have learned from my Father, I have made known to you." John 15:15. He has made us about His business. What an exciting thought that we are actually joining God in something He is doing. That gives me an extrodinary amount of peace knowing that He can't fail in His pursuits, which means in Him, neither can I. Not to mention that He calls us friends. Wow. Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-83665247295856372772010-05-19T08:02:00.000-07:002010-05-19T08:20:19.835-07:00Egg hunt anyone?Recently, I was talking to my oldest son about God and as I was talking, God began to put a picture in my head to help me illustrate the point I was trying to make to him. While I will skip the background story except to say it was around Easter, the conversation went something like this. "How would you feel, Ben, if I woke you up on Easter and said let's go on an Easter egg hunt, only to walk down stairs and show you that I had put all the Easter eggs in a big pile in the kitchen. Granted they are all still full of treats, but they aren't hidden. What would that be like?" Of course he said, no fun. That is when I shared with him that God has given us an innate curiousity and desire to discover and that He is what is in the Easter eggs. He has tucked these treasures all over the universe. Some are found in books, some are found in relationships, some are found in brokenness and pain, some are found in places that you didn't even know you were looking for an egg in. Some are found in the eyes of a child waiting to be adopted. Many of you know the story of my niece and her homecoming, Josie Love Mayernick. Suzanne and I often talked about how much of a treasure she is and one day I added that she was a hidden treasure. God hid a unique thumbprint of His beauty in her, and it took a journey filled with uncertainty, pain, and faith to get to the point where that egg could be opened and revealed in perfect timing. We don't always know what is going to be inside the egg. Like I said, much of the time we don't even really know that we are on an egg hunt. But rest assured, He has done this very thing. Matthew says the kingdom of God is like treasure hidden in a field and it is worth selling all you have to attain. Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-67342927878263198422010-04-19T14:43:00.000-07:002010-04-19T16:48:26.092-07:00Why International?From the very beginning of our journey, there were different questions or comments that came up over and over again along the way. One of them was, "Why do you want to go adopt all the way across the world when there are kids right here in America that need homes?" Most of the time, I believe this was simply asked out of genuinecuriousity and not with ill-intent. Either way, it came up again today so Ithought I would take a moment to respond to this. It is a good question for which there is not one simple answer, but I will share my thoughts. First, I think when people ask this question, there is an assumption that adoption was ONLY a choice of the adoptive family. This fails to recognize a basic Christian principle that God has prepared in advance good works for those who are now followers of him. He has a plan for each of our lives and it was authored by Him. So in essence, while we make the choice to adopt, we are also recognizing that He has something in mind, and it then becomes a journey to discover Him and that plan. It is obvious that His plan for some families is to seek to adopt here in the US, and some overseas. So ultimately, I think that question should be directed to Him and He would welcome it :-) My second response to this is this: recently, Haiti experienced a terrible tragedy. The earthquake that hit completely devastated this country in so many ways. When news of the devastaion hit, Americans and mandy other people in nations abroad joined together in an effort to respond with all kinds of aid for these broken and suffereing people. You didn't hear people say, "Well, we have homeless, hungry people here in the US (or Great Britain, etc) , shouldn't we feed them and take care of all of them before we run off to Haiti?" No. We heard of people in desperate need and we responded to meet that need. See, we are made in the image of God and are thus, His image-bearers. <br />As the bearers of His image, we will be sensitive to those in need, no matter where they live, just as He is. In many cases of overseas adoption, this is what has happened. Someone hears of a situation of an individual child, or of crises in an area, and are broken and moved to respond with the same love, compassion, and care our Papa God shows to all who are broken and in need. His loving arms reach all over the globe and show no favoratism or partiality in regards to race or nationality, so why, then, if we are made in His image, made to do what we see the Father do, being lead by His Spirit, would we not do the same thing? Even from a political standpoint, where would the world be if America had never looked out for those vulnerable people in other nations and reached out to them, despite that we haven't fixed every single problem in our country first? Simply put, I just don't think love has borders. I believe in reaching out to those in need here, which many, many are doing, and those in other nations. As believers, we are called to make disciples of all nations. Jesus called us to the ends of the earth. I see this as just one snapshot of how that call is fufilled. Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-34508510219395128772010-03-21T11:46:00.000-07:002010-03-21T12:47:43.694-07:00We MUST do something...I recently watched a video on the church's response the the orphan and the widow, in it, they were talking about how terrorists are now starting to target orphans, abducting them to train them up to be terrorists. Is there a more clear picture of the intentions of the enemy than this? The enemy is an opportunist and wants to take the most innocent and vulnerable of our society and do what he does best....steal, kill, and destroy. He is doing this in very overt and clear ways. What happens to those who do not get adopted? For many of them, their lives end up on a path of complete and total destruction. Sex-slavery, prostitution, drugs, child-soldiers (who, by the way, are often sodomized and infected purposefully with HIV upon arrival at these soldier camps), terrorists, alcoholism. Where the church does not step in, the enemy will and the results will be devastating and not just to these children, but to society. Contrast this to what happens to these same children when a loving, Christian family adopts and or takes responsibility for these children, then they are given the opportunity to get to know the One who loves them, made them, and has GOOD plans for their lives, not just here on earth, but for all of eternity. This is quite a contrast. It is the contrast we all face as humans spiritually as we chose to accept Christ or not. I know not EVERY believer is called to participate in EVERY ministry that has been formed. I personally don't want anyone to feel guilted into serving the Father in any way. However, there are certain things that scripture teaches are things that we should all be doing, things we don't need to wait for God to "call" us to. My job as a believer is never to convict anyone of anything. The Holy Spirit is fully capable of executing this job with grace and perfection. But, I cannot read the facts and statistics and not raise my voice in response. So, I am going to give you a list of scriptures that outline how we as the church are called to respond to the widow and the orphan. The way this response is explained in scripture denotes provision, concern, and consideration that was to be consistently incorporated as a way of life into the lives of God's people, not just a once in a while or and occasional when I feel like it type of response. Here are some of the references: Exodus 22:22-24, Deuteronomy 10:18, 14:29, 16:11, 16:14, 24:17, 24:19, 24:20, 24:21, 26:12, 26:13, 27:19; Job 24:9, 29:12, 31:16-18,21-22, Psalm 10:14,17-18, 68:5, 146:9, Proverbs 23:10-11, Isaiah 1:17, Jeremiah 5:28, 7:5-7, 22:3, Hosea 14:3, Zechariah 7:10, Malachi 3:5, John 14:18, Romans 8:23, 9:4, Galations 4:5, Ephesians 1:5, James 1:27 . Herein lies not only evidence that we are called to respond, all of us, but moreover and more importantly, look at how these scriptures reveal an intimate and precious portion of God's heart. God gave his most precious gift in Christ SO THAT WE MIGHT BE ADOPTED into his family. Clearly, adoption is centered in the very heart of God himself. To care for the orphan is to journey to get to know this portion of God's heart in a more clear and intimate way. I also have observed a wave going through the church (and also non-believers....for he reigns down on the just and the unjust) that He is burdening people in mass numbers to mobilize on behalf of the orphan and the widow to care for them, through MANY avenues, including adoption, foster care, sponsership, etc.... There are multiple ways to care for them. However, each of us needs to ask the spirit what that looks like in our individual lives, but rest assured, we are called to do something, not just look the other way. Jesus is always full of grace and full of truth. There is never a compromise of one for the other, so I ask and pray that my words will come across in the same way. But I do sense an urgency in my spirit for these precious children especially in light of what is also mobilizing against them. If you feel burdened, pray, press in to Him and listen, go to that meeting, make that phone call, start somewhere and God will begin to guide your steps, close and open doors. If you don't feel a concern, pray God gives you one. Ask that you might feel just a drop of what He does towards these children. I know GOd has to continue to soften my heart towards the things that He values all the time. Don't be afraid, for He will provide for you and in the process, you discover the greatest reward of getting to know Him more, trust him more and depend on him more. Please, Father, move in the hearts of your children, mobilizing them on behalf of the fatherless so that there won't be any children who don't know they are loved, and cared for, and made for a purpose. Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-14228971453335053132010-03-13T06:40:00.000-08:002010-03-13T19:12:23.318-08:00What is the hub of your wheel?God often puts pictures in my head to help explain truth to me. I guess I am a bit more impacted by visual images than just by words. One of the clearest pictures once was a wagon wheel. He was explaining to me that in our faith, Jesus represents the center hub and all of the spokes represented the life or expressions of our faith that flow out of the hub. In other words, the righteous acts, the good works, they are all centered on Christ himself and flow out from Him. I believe that all things we are called to whether it be adoption, or helping the homeless, or ministering to people of other faiths, that there is one ultimate unifying purpose. It is the same purpose for which God sent Christ, made the earth, and does all of what He does. It is the revelation of Himself and by that I don't just mean what He does, but the very essence of who He is. Whether He is proclaiming it to the world, or in a very intimate personal way to one person, His heart is the same. He is revealing Himself in all his glory, goodness, strength, grace and love to all of the universe. Knowing that helps me to stay centered. There is singular pursuit in the depths of my heart and that is to know more of Him and ultimately be able to help others see Him in their lives, too. I believe He is what our hearts long for more than anything else. I truly just love him and who He is. He is so gracious and patient with me. He doesn't get angry and mad at me when I make mistakes or am slow to learn as I often am. Because of how sweet He is to me, I just want to be with Him. He is the safest place my heart knows. He is FULL of grace and deals with his creation in the most graceful ways. It is always good to remember your chains. Remember where you were before God called you to some form of service. Remember the fears, the uncertainties, even the resistance. Remember the grace with which He called you to this. We are called to be no less graceful in our service to Him. We are ultimately here to reveal Him, in the fullest way we know how to. Whether that be through adoption or what ever you have been called to we are here to show His heart to the world. Having said that, I am here to say that our pursuit to adopt began as a graceful invitation. He pricked my heart as He opened my eyes the plight of the children of China many years ago. Later, He worked in my husband's heart to give us unity about it. He later provided the resources, the direction and the grace to calm all our fears in the process. He worked to bring us to a deeper place in our relationship with Him. We were painfully inadequate and sometimes downright afraid and unwilling. That is how each of us begin our journeys. We have nothing to bring to the table. God does it. So my hope is that through my story you can see God's faithfulness. How mighty He is. I hope you can see his sweet heart for the fatherless and how he goes to great lengths to show his love to them to make them feel wanted, accepted, and loved. I want our story to inspire you to trust Him more. If He is stirring your heart to adopt, just know that He will provide for all your needs: emotionally, physically, and in every other way. And in the process you will be blessed to know a deeper part of His heart. God is moving in HUGE ways right now to place the fatherless in homes and to revive the church so that we see our call to care for them. He is not only pouring out his heart and passion for this but releasing resources for it as well. He is just calling you to join Him! It is His call, His work, we are just blessed to be vessels for Him. Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-32900334286760716012010-02-24T16:52:00.001-08:002010-02-24T17:10:16.441-08:00What other choice do we have?Dreams. Dreams are SO powerful. Nothing can make one feel like they are riding on the highest cloud or crashing to the depths of the ocean floor than a dream realized or one crushed. I have had both. Looking in the eyes of my daughter, is one realized. Then there are those waiting on the wind. Ones I don't know if will ever be fulfilled. I do know this, I cannot put my hope in them. Maybe there is someone reading this with the dream to adopt. Maybe you even feel like you heard from the Lord on this, yet, the doors just don't seem to open. Or maybe your dream is something different. It doesn't really matter what that is. What does matter is what you do with it, or rather, to whom you take it to. Standing on the edge of your desires, what choice is there but to completely abandon yourself to the one who made you? I love and am passionate about adoption. I hope one day to adopt more God (and husband :-) willing, but I am even more passionate about seeing God become bigger and more real in peoples lives. I was born and raised in a Christian home, which I am grateful for, but it presents its challenges in the way of not reducing your faith to a religion. I got to a point in my life where I was SO tired of religion and yet I knew there HAD to be more. Let me tell you, there was. And there HE was. When I got tired of trying to DO, I came to HIM and asked Him to show me more. He hasn't stopped showing me more since. He wasn't kidding when He told Abraham that HE was the great reward. These were his words AFTER he began to spell out all that HE would do through Abraham....He still said HE was the great reward. The promise is not the reward. The adoption is not the reward. The dream is not the reward. HE is the very great reward. The struggle for me is to not forget that and begin to think that I must acquire the promises (blessings) of GOd in order to be fufilled. Right now I am in the midst of wrestling with that very thing. I cannot make things happen and don't want to . Sometimes I just want to throw in the towel because it is too hard to want something and not be sure that I am going to get it. I want to let go and hold on all at the same time. I guess I am coming to that familiar place that I have been so many times and realizing what choice do I have but to lay it all at the feet of my precious savior who has over and over and over again proven his love, faithfulness and good intentions toward me. What other good choice is there? Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-72986393038566115132010-02-07T19:07:00.000-08:002010-02-07T19:29:52.035-08:00Amused...Life around here, despite the cold, snow, and now the Colts losing the Super bowl, has been good. I am SO loving seeing my daughter begin to be amused by her siblings, and her parents :-) She has started to laugh more and she smiles all the time! She took five or six steps on her own this past week and is SO ready to run she can't stand it! I love that! It has been a challenge over the last few months, and I have had many moments of just being uncertain as to how she was going to adjust and wondering if she was truly happy, so it is SUCH a blessing to see her truly enjoy herself. I was telling a friend today about how much I have learned about bonding. It has really helped me feel bonded to her as she has begun to respond with joy and amusement to us. I had the revelation today that while God always unconditionally loves us, I imagine that He feels closer to us when we are able to receive His love and we respond to it. As much as there has been divine intervention in our adoption process and certain undeniable evidence of God's hand and how He has purposed for this child to be ours, I think I have been surprised at just the humanity involved. Building relationships in general just take time. You don't become best friends with someone the very first time you meet them. There has to be mutual affinity for one another and some sort of investment of time and emotion to build that. Even though there are many things about adoption that are different, so many of the same principles apply. I think my expectations/desires where just a little unrealistic for the time given. Hind sight is 20/20 though :-) It has been good to have people to talk to about this along the way, which I would encourage others in this process to do, and or seek out if need be. Adoption is amazing, and so much of it has been a beautiful, wonderful, experience, but there are challenges as well, and if you aren't careful to take those before God, and bring them out in the open with people who can give wise counsel and speak truth, the enemy can definitely have a hay-day with that. I am sure more challenges are to come, but praise God for a lesson learned :-) Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-26896918145467571662010-01-29T22:16:00.000-08:002010-01-29T22:30:49.621-08:00Down for the Count...Well, it hit today. I knew I couldn't avoid it for forever, it has been at least two or three years since I had a stomach virus, and it made a visit today. Praise GOd, and I mean that in ALL sincerity that it was only about 12 hours. But it was 12 hours of praying for many family members and friends in between lifting up prayers for Jesus to come back! So, since I have been laying in bed for the last twelve hours, I now am feeling SO much better (nothing like a BIG glass of gingerale!) However, my new burst of energy is hitting me at 1245 AM. SO, I am checking blogs, email, facebook, and the like and trying to catch up on all my people. I may even have to go and take some pictures of my house as I have NO idea what has been happening today! I do remember at one point seeing my little ones with a full bag, Costco size, of shredded cheese walking around the house at one point. I rememeber trying to mumble something to them from the couch, but it was to no avail. I think I heard my husband later when he got home trying to get my eight year old to vaccuum. I just laid there and told myself that there isn't anything that can't be replaced or fixed later. Ha! I also got the privelidge (why can't I spell that word!!!?) in all my time of praying for my sweet sister in law Karen and her husband today as they were in Russia standing before a judge in order to take custody of their son! God had some mountains to move there, (see snyderfamilyadoption.blogspot.com) and in true-saviour-of-the-universe and Lord-of-all-fashion, He did so! SO I am anxiously awaiting the day they can bring him home to his forever family! I laugh at my own life today and the fact that I at one point I apologized to my sweet Mia for the crazy life i have brought her too and assured her that it is indeed a better life despite what today looked like! I love to see God do God sized things and am so thankful for ANOTHER opportunity to watch this! (Also glad it was from the side lines this time! ) Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-33812496456490871232010-01-09T18:02:00.000-08:002010-01-09T18:25:09.584-08:00It's never like I think....So many people have asked about how Mia is doing and adjusting. Over the last two months, a couple of things have continued to be clear as I have fielded and pondered that question. She is doing amazingly well! It has been myself and my husband who have needed the most help :-) I was talking to my husband's sister who is in the process of adopting from Russia right now, and she was asking about how to prepare for her little guy coming home and whether or not she should re-read some of the books or what not that were required reading for the adoption process. In all honesty, I told her no. I began to think about how the one who has had the most adjusting to do is me. My husband and I are blessed to have a friend/counselor who is a "father" of sorts in our lives who gives us wise counsel and meets with us when we need it. We both have had issues come to the surface since we have brought our sweet daughter home. We were able to meet with him and talk about some of these things. Time after time as he spoke of God's heart for us and how it is to be revealed through us to our kids, I was convicted at the apparent self-centeredness, need to control things, and just plain lack of unconditional love that I was seeing come to the surface in my life and all the ugly things that were coming out of me as a result of these unsanctified places in my heart. It was at this point that I began to think about the question regarding Mia's adjustment and realized that one of God's purposes in this adoption has been to refine my own heart and purify these things. I told my sister in law, that instead of trying to focus on all the things that could be issues with your child, instead, ask Him to begin to prepare her heart for what He is going to be doing in her. Don't get me wrong, it is good to have made yourself familiar with the "maybes" and to have access to these resources if needed, but for the most part, we, the parents, are the ones who have accrued decades worth of baggage, compared to the few months or years these little ones have been alive! <br /><br />I love that God does not leave us as we are. He is not content to save us and let us continue to walk in our sin and selfishness! Praise you Father that you are not only willing but able to deliver us from ourselves! I am excited as I see us beginning to change and it is freeing us to just enjoy our sweet Mia. She is SUCH a delight! Her smile is so precious and I live seeing her just thrive and grow as she basks in our love and delight just as I am growing and changing under the smile and delight of my Father. Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-25158018379624049382009-12-28T18:15:00.000-08:002009-12-28T18:33:22.492-08:00One month down, and lovin' life....So I spent some precious time talking recently with a sweet friend of mine who adopted a couple of years ago and let me say, what a blessing she was and what a blessing the conversation was! Honestly, I had been wrestling with some anxiety, guilt, and fears associated with the adoption and while I have a lot of wonderful friends who are wise and loving and great listeners, God knew I needed someone who also had walked through in some capacity what we have and has that empathy to offer as well. Since the moment she walked out the door, it was as if a weight was lifted! Ever since then, all that I had hoped and longed for as it related to just having our sweet daughter home seems to be coming to the surface. Mia-Asha is SO very happy!! It has taken us a while to work out the sleeping thing, as she just does not like going to bed alone in her crib, but we have a pretty good thing going with naps during the day with us in the family room and her the crib at night, where she (most of the time) sleeps all night...WOO HOO! She has learned to feed herself, hold a cup, wave, clap, climb stairs, cruise around the furniture, and stand for about a minute unsupported in addition to cutting four teeth just in the last month! Today, was her first actual encounter with snow and if I can ever figure out how to upload video, you can see her just grin her precious half-toothed grin as I pull her around the yard in the snow in her little baby sled she got for her birthday! I am glad she enjoyed that because she really HATED all the fuss of getting into her snow gear! <br /><br />Christmas was also great, too, as we had a relaxing few days here in Indy with Brian's immediate and extended family. We are home for a couple of more days before heading down to Nashville to visit with my family. I am looking forward to a LONG rest after that from the craziness of the holidays and traveling and all the out of the ordinary events that have been happening non stop since we got home on Nov. 21st. <br /><br />Hopefully, I will have a little more time to put up more pics and what not then too. It has been difficult to do life, the holidays and the updates, so as things slow maybe that can pick up a bit. <br /><br />Hope you all had a wonderful Christmas! Looking forward to a blessed New Year! Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-6181446578827094622009-12-13T18:43:00.000-08:002009-12-13T19:05:16.661-08:00Worship Him!So my life has yet to slow down lately. I am almost always and only just doing good to care for basic needs of my four kids, while still trying to figure out dinner and laundry and at the same time, trying to be patient, loving, and available to all my kids and my husband, and also trying to figure out how to realistically celebrate this season without putting too much extra stuff on our plate. I really have yet to get a hold on all of this, and am especially discouraged sometimes at my short temper with my kids and my lack of pursuit of God and my relationship with him. I walk around knowing and seeing all of this...all of these shortcomings, ways I need to be refined and am being refined by Him. Ways I am so unlike the Father and yet so yearning and needing him to change me to be the mom and wife I am called to be right now. Anything good in me comes directly from Him. I know that beyond a shadow of a doubt. I see it on a daily, moment by moment basis. There is no one good Jesus said. Only God. Don't I know it. So when I walk into church, like today, or anywhere else, and am met with "Wow, you are amazing to do what you did!" It is so hard for me to hear. I didn't do anything. God put a desire in me. He gave me a heart of flesh instead of stone so that I would be soft to His call. He provided the direction, the money, and pointed us to the child. He sustains me daily in my war against my flesh and is the only beautiful thing in or about me. Today in worship we were singing a worship song called offering by Paul Baloche. The lyrics that inspired this post were, <br />"No mortal man would dare to stand before Your throne <br />Before the Holy One of heaven <br />It's only by Your Blood and it's only through you mercy <br />Lord I come <br /><br /><br />I bring an offering of worship to my King <br />No one on earth deserves the praises that I sing <br />Jesus may You receive the honor that You're due <br />O Lord I bring an offering to You <br />I bring an offering to You <br /><br />No one on earth deserves the praises that I sing. That line has resonated in me over and over. No one deserves our praise but God. I know most people aren't trying to worship others when they say things like you are amazing, or I am so inspired by you, etc...I am sure I have said the same types of things countless times to others, as well. But if you are reading this, could you please do me a favor? Would you offer this to God on our behalf? I want my life to inspire praise and worship of the One , the ONLY One who deserves it. We serve an amazing God! He is awesome and can do all things. When there is not "enough" He can do CREATIVE miracles and make enough. He is the one who gives dreams and desires to us, gives us the grace to say yes to his plan, and then provides all that we need, in every capacity to see that it is accomplished. His glory and renown are the desire of my heart. I long for Him to be seen for who He truly is. Amazing. Beautiful. Faithful. Enough. I am so less than amazing or inspiring, but I am getting to know the One who is and He is worthy. Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-65713838984447839232009-12-06T20:17:00.000-08:002009-12-06T21:06:03.159-08:00Misconceptions...We went to church together as a family of six today for the first time. It was SOOO good to be all together in worship. I had so much emotion, yet at the same time was only able to really express a little of it. It was awesome to have so many people see Mia for the first time, so many who had been praying for her and praying for us and praying for her homecoming. It was like coming home in a whole other sense. When we started singing, one of the songs we sang happened to be all about Jesus, and him being victorious, him being stronger, him being the overcomer, just all about him. I sang these words with a new sense of humility that I have not known before. I have had several moments everyday since we got back that have been really challenging for this mom of now four kids. And by challenging, I mean face down, carpet up the nose, crying out to God kind of challenging. As a matter of fact, I feel like the difficulty has not really stopped since the week we got the call to go and get Mia. Granted the face of what has made it difficult continues to change based on the day or circumstance, but I cannot help but feel that this may be more of a season we are entering rather than just an experience. I am sure as we begin to adjust and I figure out how all this is going to work better logistically it may get somewhat better, but I am starting to see that God has some major refining He is doing in me. What I want to really make clear, in light of this, is what hit me this morning in worship. We have had so many people come to us and say how they admire what we have done. We have been told how great we are and how amazing what we are doing is and how we are just amazing people. I need to set the record straight. I have never felt so incapable, so small, so UNable, so inadequate, so weak in all of my life. Everyday is a challenge. Everyday I wake up and realize I can't do this on my own. I am not saying this to sound spiritual or because it is something I have just embraced as a truth in my head. It is my reality. I am so impatient. I am so not on top of things. I have never had so many half done things in all my life. It drives me crazy but I am learning to let go of what is non-essential. The reason I want to share this is because I don't want anyone out there to look at us, look at our adoption and say to themselves that we did it because we had something, some special ability to handle it, or we were wired differently, or what ever that made it easier or more accessible for us. It just simply isn't true. The truth is I am learning what it means to really need God. Like David said in the Psalms, to thirst after HIm like a deer panting for water. A panting deer I imagine has probably been running. Pursuing something or being pursued and when if finally stops for a moment, either out of sheer exhaustion or possibly because it has narrowly escaped what was hunting it, it is desperate for a drink. Desperate for something to bring refreshment and life into its inner being. It needs that water. This is how I feel and I have never been more grateful or at peace in my whole life. I know this is what He desires...that I be dependent on him. I told a friend today at church, that there have been many times I have gone to spend time with God and it has been a choice. I did it because I wanted to or I should, but now I am desperate for the life He offers. I am excited about my life and about what GOd is doing and what I will continue to become as He continues to work in me. I love who He is and how He parents us, how he loves us and I am excited that He is going to make me more like Him. I my weakness his strength is made perfect. NOT just words. Truth. None of us are capable of accomplishing what things God has planned for us to do on our own. True dependence on Him is hard at times. There is no room for pride, and my pride is used to having its own room. I love where I am, even though I hate it at times. HE is sooooo good. So faithful. So able. He is enough for me, and his grace is sufficient for me. I am weak, He is SO strong and as one of our pastors was talking this morning, He has given us His spirit. The same one who raised Jesus from the dead, and my hope is in the fact that He has all power over sin in my life. I am dependent on that power. And it isn't just available to the "special" people. It is available to all who call on His name. All who claim The Son, and give their lives over to Him. None of us are able to walk out what He has called us to do on our own, and the best part of that is that we are supposed to be able to do it on our own. THAT IS PART OF THE PLAN! Hopefully, someone out there may be encouraged by this. Encouraged to not let your feelings of inadequacy when considering what ever God may be calling you to do be translated as a reason in an of itself to NOT step out in faith. Yet, it is an opportunity for God to be God and you to be a child of God in a whole new way you have had yet to experience. We are not amazing people. We are redeemed people who are being sanctified through obedience, trials, and fire :-) and it is a blessing I am so glad I am not missing. Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-4664940262719948732009-11-29T18:39:00.000-08:002009-11-29T19:01:59.234-08:00SO much to be thankful for!!!Life has really been a whirlwind the last couple of weeks! SO many changes...SO much travelling...SO many things to process! I am still in the midst of trying to sort through all of our experiences, find our "new normal" with four kids, and figure out what to do with the coming holidays :-) It was great to all be together for thanksgiving this year...especially since there was a time when we weren't sure if that would happen! Out of everything I have to be thankful for, and believe me, it is quite a list, I must say, having Mia here with us and Josie Love home, impacted me more than anything. When we were in India, after being there for a couple of days, all I could think about was how I had to get Mia home...I had to get her out of India. I saw for her no hope there. Even now, as precious as the pictures we were sent over the months before we went to get here were, I can hardly stand to look at them now. Always in the crib. Always laying down. Never smiling. I LOVE to see her smile! I LOVE to watch her crawl and explore, all the time telling her, "go ahead, honey, this is YOUR home now!" She really didn't know what to do with her freedom at first. (Although, she is learning fast!) In addition to that, I also was able to spend some time around sweet Josie Love! Oh my goodness! Talk about stealing your heart away! I cannot even begin to describe how her spirit just draws you in! She has the best, and most mischevious I might add, smile I have ever seen! Maybe it's because it is below those precious half-closed eyes, I don't know, but she will have you wrapped around her little finger in a heart beat! I am SOOO thankful she is home, finally, where God has planned for her to be from the foundations of the world, as well. I could hardly stand hearing the stories about how she used to hold her head down, not smile, not communicate, whimper, and not be able to walk. This was just a few WEEKS ago, people. I don't even see a hint of that child. Praise you GOD! <br /><br />Brian and I were talking on the way to thanksgiving at my parents about how much harder life is than what we expected growing up. I am coming to the peaceful realization that it isn't going to get any easier, but that God is going to show himself bigger. Never has that rung truer than walking through this adoption process, which by the way has been 4 and 1/2 years not 3 and 1/2 as I had been thinking. BUT, as I was there with my family, watching them love and embrace our Mia-Asha and sweet Josie Love, I can say with out hesitation, it was ALL worth it. Every tear, every delay, every fearful, fretful, uncertain step, it was ALL worth it. I am SO very thankful for not only my daughter, but all that I had to go through in order to get her here. Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-27788816215419383942009-11-22T19:09:00.000-08:002009-11-22T19:21:28.122-08:00Aaahhh....HOME.Words cannot describe how deeply relieved and excited to be back in the states, and especially back in my own home with ALL four of my children here with me. I actually got out today and went to Target with Ella-Kate. I am finally just beginning to process some of what I saw on our journey to the other side of the world and today I wept for India. I wept for the 15 million people in Kolkata and the chaos, both physically and spiritually they live in. I wept at the thought that there is nothing short of Jesus' redemptive return that can fix all that is broken there. I weep for gratitude knowing that my daugher is here, able to grow up in this country, instead of there where "she has no hope" as one woman in India commented to me. Then I contrasted that to the faces of those I looked upon in the store and I wondered why is it that instead of a deep sense of gratitude for all that we have here, does our society here in the US instead seem to breed a deep sense of entitlement? We take SOOO much for granted--- the FDA even with all its faults, is SUCH a huge blessing. In India I stayed in four star hotels and still couldn't drink the water. I always had to be contientious of ice, could not eat any raw fruits or vegetables or eat dairy products while I was there. The sanitation department....oh my goodness. I was so thankful for that in our nation when I would pass huge piles of trash a block long just laying on the sidewalk beside the streets. I saw mommas bathing their children in puddles on the sides of the major streets that run through the city. Men drinking brown water out of plastic water bottles that looked like they were ten years old. My daughter will not remember her short time in India, but I will never forget it, God help me never forget it. I am OVERWHELMED with things to thank GOd for this year...<br /><br />I want to write more and post more pictures but I am falling asleep literally in front of the computer screen. Maybe tomorrow :-) Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-25780399931392764572009-11-19T23:24:00.000-08:002009-11-19T23:40:05.995-08:00Almost there!We are in Delhi, now, which has really been so different than Kolkata. I have settled down and gotten used to the pace here, and have actually enjoyed being here in Delhi. I am not sure how to describe it, as it is quite different depending on which part you are in, but we have seen some beautiful ruins from the car rides, monkeys as Brian mentioned on his facebook, and today, I saw and elephant walking down the middle of the street, where the cars are, with someone riding on it's back! The hotels have been great here (thank the Lord for that) and we have gotten to connect with TWO other Dillon families which has been great, especially in being able to empathize and laugh some about the absolute CRAZINESS of our journeys! <br /><br />Our big news today is that we got the Visa done and in our hands! I am SOOOOOOO relieved! I finally feel like the stress has almost all but gone away. It of course was not with out a few frustrating moments in that you NEVER know what is going on around here! I will blog more specifics a little later as I think I am on the ONE computer in our whole hotel here in Delhi. <br /><br />We are loving the time we have with Mia-Asha (yes we finally chose a middle name, and in good time as we had to give that info on the visa app today!) Asha is the Indian word for hope. She is so very sweet and VERY busy! Brian is upstairs with her right now while she naps. I have jumped right into mommyhood , however as she has decided to cut her first tooth--red swollen gums, fever, and the whole bit. So she hasn't felt the best. You could pray for her for that and for the 20 plane ride we have ahead of us tonight. Her medical appointment went well yesterday, had a WONDERFUL Dr. see her, but she had to have 3 immunizations, already having struggled with fever and not feeling well, so I am sure that doesn't help.<br /><br />I really can't wait to share more of our trip with you all! I have been able to process some and have been enjoying it here so much more that the first part of the week. The Indian people are really beautiful in so many ways and there are so many amazing parts of their culture and history. <br /><br />One quick funny story, yesterday while driving to her medical appointment, we passed a small shopping area that had a banner out in front of the store. It was huge and black and in very large lettering, i THOUGHT i saw an advertisement that read CAR BOMBS....it was CAR BOOM. Brian and i had a good laugh about that one! Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-24188494436264087142009-11-17T21:37:00.000-08:002009-11-17T22:37:34.706-08:00Details, details...Well, I have a lot of catching up to do so, this is going to be a long one! Like I have said, it has been a rough last few days (up until yesterday :-)) After our middle of the night "scene out of a bad movie" experience, we made it back to the airport in Delhi where we got the sneaking feeling over the next few hours that everyone else there may not have been as excited about our being there as we were. That is a strange feeling, not just be the minority but in a foreign country where you were told the terror risk towards Americans was high :-)In addition to that, I could not get my phone card to work, couldn't figure out how to make local or long distance calls just to hear family's voice, and when we finally did get to Kolkata, we couldn't find our driver for almost two hours, and could call because we didn't know how and were absolutely and totally exhausted. It was at this point, I think God had seen enough and had mercy on us because out of nowhere, this Indian man dressed completely in white showed up at the phone booth we were trying to make a call from and took over. He helped us figure out the phone was broken and then he proceeded to call our hotel for us, locate our driver (who had been told we were at the international airport instead of the domestic, and then proceeded to be our "hedge of protection" out of those locals who were trying to get us to ride in their cab or allow them to carry our bags. When our driver showed up, he smiled and said, "oh, yes, Mr. Singh (our driver)...he is a friend of mine, very good man", smiled helped us in our car, refused to be tipped and waved goodbye. I was never so inclined to want to kiss a strange foreign man in all of my life (I held back, although I think I said thank you a million times.) When we finally got to our hotel, we took a hot shower, and fell asleep for about 6 hours. We had planned to start our sightseeing that afternoon, but were just too exhausted. The hotel in Kolkata, was wonderful. The staff were so helpful and amazing and the food has just been incredible. Monday, we did go sight seeing, including the New Market where you bargain. It was also exhausting. We were able to find some great gifts and memoriblia (including two of the cutest saaris for the girls I have EVER seen), got ripped off a couple of times (which was okay because I know no one there is getting rich off anything), and saw all of what you would imagine one would see in Kolkata in regards to the beggars and the poor. I was an experience. Our diver, Mr. Singh was so great. He would drive and give us the history of the city, and you could tell he was so very proud of his country. We learned a great deal and developed a great connection to him. Yesterday, he told us that I reminded him of his daughter of the same age who was getting married (an arranged one of course) and said if we were in town next year in Cashmere, he would be happy to have us as guests for the wedding. I was so honored and humbled to receive that invitation. We then tried to head to the home of MOther Theresa where after only being there a few minutes, they experienced a power outage and we had to leave. I was at least glad we had the few minutes we had. Being there in the city and then thinking about her ministry there really put things in a different light. She has had an incredible impact on the city. <br /><br />That night, I did not sleep well. I was really anxious about a lot. I think I had just not had anytime to process, was severly sleep deprived, and probably some what in culture shock. I was feeling somewhat ashamed at how scared, faithless, and anxious I was. I got up early and just began to pour out my heart to God, telling him these things and that here I was exactly where I had been telling everyone I wanted to be for so long and yet, I was almost paralyzed emotionally. "How inspiring is that?" or something like that was my comment. Then oh so graciously after listening to all I had to say, the Lord reminded me that he did not create me to inspire, he created me to glorify Him and that I needed to admit and give him all my insecurities and that He would show me and whoever else watching that He is able and more than enough to meet all our needs and has grace to always meet us where we are at. I agreed with him that this was better. When all is said and done, I would much rather someone look back over my life and see the faithfulness of God than I would have them see what appears to be my own bravery or faith. I boast in nothing but Christ alone. After that word, I felt much better as you can imagine. <br /><br />Tuesday, as you know, was gotcha day! There had been some concern the day prior as to the safety of foreigners actually showing up at the orphanage (which is customary)and lead to the couple the day before not being able to go, but Ms. Roy having to bring their child to the hotel. While the main point is to receive the child, I was desperately hoping things would be resolved so that we could go and get photos, video, and ask all our questions as that would all be so very important for Mia to know as she gets older and seeks to know more about these details of her life. As is all turned out, we were able to go, thankfully, but did have to be rushed in and out very discreetly and quickly. While there, we were able to do all that we wanted, having some very sweet conversation with Ms. Roy and the anyahs (caretakers) about Mia her birth mom and her time with them. It was a precious, priceless experience! These babies are not in a very formal place but they are very very loved and cared for. God showed me later that day, that the babies that come to them are little seeds that they are in charge of planting in good soil, that is thier love, and they tend to them, with out seeing the fruit of thier investment. For as soon as they start to bud, we, the parents sweep them away where we continue to pour into them but get the priviledge of watching them grow. What they do is so very selfless and important in the lives of these children. <br /><br />Over the last 24 hours or so, we have just enjoyed our time with Mia! It did not take me long, thanks be to GOD, to pick up on her cues for being tired and hungry, and learning how to help her get to sleep. She has taken to both of us and is saying Da-da, although we can't say it is discriminately yet! She has wanted me a lot today and is asleep on her belly on my lap right now as I type this :-) She has the cutest little grin and voice! She is really quiet though, a different dynamic than I am used to and one I don't expect will last long once around her siblings for a while :-) She can crawl and sit up well, and is trying to "walk" by getting herself on her feet and then keeping her hands on the ground, makes her way around the floor. I was told my the anyahs that she "likes the sweets". She and her sister will just be two peas in a pod in that regard :-) <br /><br />From here, we are going to get her visa pics made in a little while and then we will get on a plane tonight back to Delhi. Tomorrow we have an appointment for a medical examination in a Dehli Dr.'s office, and then take all that paperwork to our appointment at 9 am on Friday to the embassy. PLEASE PRAY WE GET HER PASSPORT DONE ON FRIDAY!!! To not, would mean two more nights (we don't have reserved or the money for ) in the city. That would mean a lot to us! We CANNOT WAIT to be home and introduce you to our sweet girl! I know she will steal your hearts as she has stolen ours! Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9063772117242651205.post-52556758205671224682009-11-17T08:35:00.001-08:002009-11-17T08:40:12.916-08:00WOO HOOO! Got her!Well, we FINALLY got her! I can't believe it! I feel SOOO less stressed right now, even though we still have a lot of hoops to jump through between now and when our plane lands on Saturday. We have also connected with a couple in our hotel that picked up their little boy yesterday, and that has been a ray of sunshine! Just to have SOMEONE to communicate freely with has been awesome! I know I keep saying this but I will write more tomorrow. We are in our friends room and are using their computer and they are going to loan it to us for the day tomorrow...SO tomorrow is story day :-) For now, enjoy the new pics I've loaded and can't wait to tell you about our adventures!!!!! Mandy Harveyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06023166965641992124noreply@blogger.com6