Oh my goodness...where do I even start? We have only been gone about 48 hours and already, I am having to stash most of our experiences in the "will process later" box I created in my brain when we started this trip. I will just say that it has been full of "unexpecteds". We are now in Calcutta, we arrived this morning after an overnight layover in Delhi. Tomorrow we will explore the town, pick up some remembrances and try to capture on video and camera as much as we can of our journey. Tuesday, is gotcha day :-) These are our plans...now for a story or two. I will post some and then Brian will give his take as well....
Like I said, there have been MANY unexpecteds. I was not expecting to feel so COMPLETELY removed from the planet I thought I lived on :-) I am amazed at just how reliant I am in my life on familiarity as a source of peace and for functionality. We have a phone card, for example, that I researced to use for international travel in India, and for the life of me cannot get it to work! The communication barrier, pace, culture, every aspect of my life here is completely foriegn to me. I am just completely at a loss to how to put all this to words...But to give you a taste of our journey, let me tell you about our overnight in Delhi. First, we THOUGHT that we were going to be staying at a hotel IN the Delhi airport (we did use a travel agent, and he has done an excellent job, by the way, so I think we all may be the victim of a "misrepresentation" in advertising here). We THOUGHT that we would simply get our bags, find our hotel in the terminal, get a few hours of sleep, regather our thoughts, take a hot shower, have some time to process, just refuel. THIS was our expectation ;-) Here is what REALLY happened....we get to the Delhi airport, (along with three other international flights of about 450 people each) at 1130pm (an hour later than our original time). We stand in long lines and are twice told we haven't filled out some paperwork we need to fill out to get into the country...so we figured that out and stood in our line. At that point, we had to wait for our baggage...and wait....and wait....and wait. I think ours literally was the last off the plane. Meanwhile, I am trying to connect with our "driver/excort" rep from the "airport hotel that was going to help us with our smooth transition to our nice relaxing convenient hotel room. We ended up having to call him which is when I found out my phone card doesn't work right. It took the better part of an hour to try and figure out a way to just contact our hotel which was supposed to be in the airport. OUr first clue should have been whent the people at the airport info desk didn't recognize the name of our hotel. About two hours later, we finally get in touch with someone where we are supposed to be staying, and they are to meet us at "gate 2" outside with a car and driver. I am thinking at this point, okay, so the hotel is on the airport grounds, just not INSIDE the airport. I am cool with that. We get in the car, after they rubberbanded two of our suitcases to the top of our car and we are off...I expected crazy driving, dirty streets, all of that, but we were driven through a war zone and dropped off somewhere that looked like a scene out of slumdog...I will let Brian take it from here.

...my wife elbowed me in the backseat of the cab as we were careening down the wrong way on a 4 lane one way street. I looked at her reassuringly, "Not to worry babe." Then, the driver turns off into an dark, dirty alley where 8 men are gathered, no hotel is anywhere in site, and remember, that this is about 1:30am. I began to feel pretty scared, helpless, and stupid all of the sudden. Eventually, some kind of hotel did emerge. Broken windows, a bucket in the floor of the shower (because there was no water pressure AT ALL, and the sense that we were the ONLY customers in the hotel led us to quickly change clothes, pay an exorbitant amount for the room, and have them drive us directly back to the airport at about 2:30am.

This morning we got to Kolkota. The hotel driver (whom it took 1.5 hours to connect with) drove us 13 miles to our hotel. Along the way, we saw probably 70 or 100 buildings all at least 50 stories tall littered about the city - all of them halfway done, the contruction efforts abandoned a year ago due to a recession. The clash of concrete, trash, people and noise here is like nothing I've ever seen. And today (Sunday) is supposedly the least busy day of the week.

More later, gotta go...

Our "Plans"

I feel a little like Moses right now when God asked him to speak knowing full well he had a stutter....I am wondering if God remembers it's me He is asking to try and plan this trip....I am somewhat details /planning challenged! SO, as it all turns out, we were able to make our visa appointment tonight for next Friday, the 20th, which is good. So as it stands, we will fly out of Indianapolis this Friday at 1pm. We go through Chicago, then straight to Dehli where will arrive late at night, and I am sure sleep comfortably in the terminal as we await our early morning flight to Kolkata where Mia is. We will get there on Sunday morning where we will spend that day and the next Monday preparing to go get her. I say preparing because my objective is to capture as much of her "beginnings" as possible through pictures, videos, and things I can bring back in my suitcase to show her and to have for us as memories to share with her one day. I am not sure exactly what these two days will look like. We are waiting on God to lead us on this one, as He knows what will be significant better than us! Then, Tuesday is "Gotcha Day!" We will spend most of our day at the orphanage. Wednesday, we will spend at the hotel just resting and getting to know her then take a late flight out back to Delhi. Once in Delhi, we get visa pictures made, medical exams, and then go to the embassy (Friday) to get her visa processed. Please pray we will get the visa on Friday! Much to the suprise of our adoption agency, the rep on the phone in Dehli mentioned they can't always do the same day turn around! Not something we expected to hear :-) Our flight leaves Saturday morning at 2am and we will be back in Indianapolis by 3pm Saturday (11/21). For those of you who have asked, we will fly in on United Airlines connecting from Chicago and yes, you are MORE than welcome to welcome us home! We would love for you to share in the celebration!

We are planning to try and update our blog while we are there, so you are again, welcome to follow us while we are gone. Right now, I have to focus on packing. I was awoken by a two year old with a fever a few moments ago and have a 5 year old who has a cold which he has so graciously shared with me, so health and as much rest as possible are two good prayer requests!

A dream...REALIZED

So, not much to say today except... WE ARE GOING TO INDIA TO GET OUR BABY GIRL!!!!!!!!! It has been a really emotional last two weeks, and this morning, laying in bed, I was thinking about how this adoption, our story, began 15 years ago with me as a dream. A dream that one day, God-willing, God-providing, I would be momma to an orphaned, neglected, baby girl. My head is swimming as I am still processing the moment this morning in front of my computer reading in disbelief about her passport being ready, my heart leaping, it's time. It's time to go get your daughter. You have waited long enough, now go....and by the way, go Friday :-) SO while we won't solidify our flight until tonight, our tentative plan is to leave this Friday, yes, three days from now! SO while this post will be short, I will have more to say tomorrow as we will have finalized travel plans! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!

Just sitting in the middle of the mud...

Fisrt, let me clarify, in my post Friday, I did not mean to come across as saying our passport was ready. Do you all really think I would have been that discreet in my announcing of news like that? (smile) What I was trying to say was that two OTHER families of the six of us who are waiting received THEIR passports. All this was was showing there was movement that was unexpected. WE DID NOT GET OUR PASSPORT. Us getting our passport=getting on a plane and flying to get my daughter. SO, there is NOTHING left keeping me from her but the silly passport, so sorry for the confusion, but we STILL do not know anything. When we do, you will hear me holler from my house and won't need the computer... :-) FYI it did not come today (Monday) either. Back to my "new" post...

So, I had a picture in my head yesterday...it was of me with wading boots on trying to manage my way through a big puddle of mud. I was desperately trying not to get any on me. The mud was the struggle, the heartache, the difficulty of life, specifically the waiting and all the emotional blah that goes with it. My picture flashed to the next scene, and here, I was not only sitting in the mud, but my fingers were squishing in it as I was just one with it. Several scriptures came to my mind, Phil 3:10-11, says "I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so somehow to attain to the resurrection of the dead." The second was Matthew 23:37 "O Jerusalem, Jerusalem [Jesus lamenting here], how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings but you were not willing." I realized that my "vision" was me trying to walk through this without walking through this and that what God wants is for me to just be in this moment and embrace all that goes with it. Jesus heart expressed in Matthew was that of a mother's heart, a longing to gather his precious children together, to care for, protect and mother them. He truly lamented over not being able to do this due to their rebellious hearts. I understand that longing to a lesser degree in my waiting to bring my child home. He suffered the longings of a mother's heart to an exponential degree. This brings the idea of "fellowshipping in his sufferings" to a new depth in my own heart. God's heart is so deep and so full of love for us that we could spend a lifetime pursing it and never fully grasp it. I know that my present struggles aren't anything big compared to what so many have, are, and will go through, so on a scale of difficulty, it's pretty low. However, it is my reality and is where I am and I hope that somehow my being open with the seemingly insignificantness of where I am will just bring into the light all the more His heart and how He does take notice of the things we feel are too small and uses those for His glory as well. Knowing Him more deeply is a prize worth suffering for. Whether it is a "small" hardship or a devastating loss, the veil ripped so that we could in the midst of it, receive the greatest prize. Don't get me wrong, I am emotionally exhausted. I am ready to go. But, I am sitting in the mud now, instead of trying to tiptoe through it, and He is sitting beside me in it :-)

Dare I even post this...

Well, we got an email this morning, two families of the 6 (us included) who are waiting for passports, unexpectedly got news that their passports were finished and ready waiting at the orphanage. This is GREAT news as it means things are moving along again. There is now a chance the rest could come in over the weekend or early next week. Obviously, we are praying for the former :-) WHAT a roller coaster of emotion... I almost didn't post this today, but after reading the depressing post I put up yesterday, I didn't want to leave that haning there :-) SO, onward we March!

Barely Holding On...

Hope deferred makes the heart sick... We will not get passport news this week, I just found out. We will get another update on Monday. This does not mean it will be done on Monday, just we will be updated. I am greiving the thought that we will not all be together at Thanksgiving and it is very very difficult for me. There is nothing I nor anyone else can do about this, I am just trying to find a way moment by moment to try and live here and now and live well, yet cannot escape the dark cloud of disappointment that follows me. I don't have a lot of strength left in me to maintain existing with this uncertainty. Appreciate all your prayers...

Happy 11 mo birthday, sweet girl...

Well, Mia turned 11 months on Monday. I have to admit, a couple of weeks ago, we really thought this was going to be our gotcha day. I am grieving that a little. I know God's timing is perfect. I know hindsight, we will see clearly. In this moment though, the waiting just hurts. God reminded me though that my pain when I give it to Him, is a worship to Him. He knows I wait and I hurt and I do it out of obedience to Him and that means something to Him. That gives me strength :-) So for those of you who are wondering and asking. No. I haven't heard anything else yet and it is really hard. All of what I know and praise God for as the truth, I cling to, but it still just hurts. You can pray for that and pray that this part is over soon :-)

On a good note, Josie Love is coming home and she is walking!!! (full story at joiningthejourney.blogspot.com) One step closer to us all being together this Thanksgiving! At this rate, we may be flying straight into Nashville :-) (Hopefully not) Anyway, thanks be to God for all the amazing miracles He is doing! Looking forward to another one!