What other choice do we have?

Dreams. Dreams are SO powerful. Nothing can make one feel like they are riding on the highest cloud or crashing to the depths of the ocean floor than a dream realized or one crushed. I have had both. Looking in the eyes of my daughter, is one realized. Then there are those waiting on the wind. Ones I don't know if will ever be fulfilled. I do know this, I cannot put my hope in them. Maybe there is someone reading this with the dream to adopt. Maybe you even feel like you heard from the Lord on this, yet, the doors just don't seem to open. Or maybe your dream is something different. It doesn't really matter what that is. What does matter is what you do with it, or rather, to whom you take it to. Standing on the edge of your desires, what choice is there but to completely abandon yourself to the one who made you? I love and am passionate about adoption. I hope one day to adopt more God (and husband :-) willing, but I am even more passionate about seeing God become bigger and more real in peoples lives. I was born and raised in a Christian home, which I am grateful for, but it presents its challenges in the way of not reducing your faith to a religion. I got to a point in my life where I was SO tired of religion and yet I knew there HAD to be more. Let me tell you, there was. And there HE was. When I got tired of trying to DO, I came to HIM and asked Him to show me more. He hasn't stopped showing me more since. He wasn't kidding when He told Abraham that HE was the great reward. These were his words AFTER he began to spell out all that HE would do through Abraham....He still said HE was the great reward. The promise is not the reward. The adoption is not the reward. The dream is not the reward. HE is the very great reward. The struggle for me is to not forget that and begin to think that I must acquire the promises (blessings) of GOd in order to be fufilled. Right now I am in the midst of wrestling with that very thing. I cannot make things happen and don't want to . Sometimes I just want to throw in the towel because it is too hard to want something and not be sure that I am going to get it. I want to let go and hold on all at the same time. I guess I am coming to that familiar place that I have been so many times and realizing what choice do I have but to lay it all at the feet of my precious savior who has over and over and over again proven his love, faithfulness and good intentions toward me. What other good choice is there?