It's never like I think....

So many people have asked about how Mia is doing and adjusting. Over the last two months, a couple of things have continued to be clear as I have fielded and pondered that question. She is doing amazingly well! It has been myself and my husband who have needed the most help :-) I was talking to my husband's sister who is in the process of adopting from Russia right now, and she was asking about how to prepare for her little guy coming home and whether or not she should re-read some of the books or what not that were required reading for the adoption process. In all honesty, I told her no. I began to think about how the one who has had the most adjusting to do is me. My husband and I are blessed to have a friend/counselor who is a "father" of sorts in our lives who gives us wise counsel and meets with us when we need it. We both have had issues come to the surface since we have brought our sweet daughter home. We were able to meet with him and talk about some of these things. Time after time as he spoke of God's heart for us and how it is to be revealed through us to our kids, I was convicted at the apparent self-centeredness, need to control things, and just plain lack of unconditional love that I was seeing come to the surface in my life and all the ugly things that were coming out of me as a result of these unsanctified places in my heart. It was at this point that I began to think about the question regarding Mia's adjustment and realized that one of God's purposes in this adoption has been to refine my own heart and purify these things. I told my sister in law, that instead of trying to focus on all the things that could be issues with your child, instead, ask Him to begin to prepare her heart for what He is going to be doing in her. Don't get me wrong, it is good to have made yourself familiar with the "maybes" and to have access to these resources if needed, but for the most part, we, the parents, are the ones who have accrued decades worth of baggage, compared to the few months or years these little ones have been alive!

I love that God does not leave us as we are. He is not content to save us and let us continue to walk in our sin and selfishness! Praise you Father that you are not only willing but able to deliver us from ourselves! I am excited as I see us beginning to change and it is freeing us to just enjoy our sweet Mia. She is SUCH a delight! Her smile is so precious and I live seeing her just thrive and grow as she basks in our love and delight just as I am growing and changing under the smile and delight of my Father.